Which Is To Say That Forgetting Is Engaging In Being

04/26/2006 7:54 AM – 8:20 AM

Zazen is the art of just sitting. You should remember that. It is not the art of breathing. It is not the art of forgetting. Those things are a part of it, but they are pleasant side-effects. Just sit. The best part of all acts of creation is when you forget that there is anything apart from what you are doing. But it is not quite forgetting, is it? All things become a part of the act, so they are not forgotten.

“In the zone” – how I hate that expression with its implication of competitive sports, but that is what the experience is. To be come so fully a part of the game that one forgets the game entirely. That is zen. To be Zen is to be in the zone, fully alive, fully awake, yet not noticing that one is alive and awake, because that is a given - there is no other thing to be. To sit is just to sit. To write is just to write. To assist patrons is just to assist patrons. To alphabetize CD’s is just to alphabetize CD’s. To ride the bus is just to ride the bus. It’s the easiest thing in the world. And it’s so damn hard to find your way in. “Of course!” you say, “that’s what that means!” But it is no, “of course.” Of course.

Why did I find it so easy to sit today? Why was it so easy to let go of the wheel and float? Is it that I was alone last night and this morning? Was it that the sun is shining? Was it that I ate fatty foods before I went to bed? And, oddly, that would normally be something that I would worry and fret over. I would analyze and calculate and plan. But right now, I’m just right here. There’s a plane flying by somewhere overhead and it is a part of what I’m doing. There’s cars driving down Elmwood and they are a part of what I’m doing. My keyboard is making clicking noises, and it’s a part of what I’m doing. Where is it? To fulfill the self is to forget the self, to forget the self is to fill the self so that it overflows. St. Ayn isn’t wrong, but neither is St. Paul. There is only self but to be fully selfish is to forget the self and let the self do the beautiful thing that this very self is doing. I don’t know how you find this place, but you can find it. You’ve found it before. I’m here right now. You’ll find your way back. Your symbol is the turtle – your home is always with you. Walk slow and still. This is how God talks to you – in silence – this is how you talk to God. Just sit. Just walk slow. Just be. For this one second, be endless.