In Which There Is a List of Things At the End

04/25/2006 8:21 AM – 8:43 AM

The instants are just the instants, though sometimes, they’re good advice, sometimes bad advice, sometimes they’re just moments. I remember that all time is a series of instants; all time is a flow of unbroken nows. Where do I go? What does it matter where I go? All things will revolve around this second that holds me, no matter where this second is.

What am I looking for? Did you forget that it’s found only in this self that doesn’t exist except as an aggregate of particles and memories in spacetime? What is it that I want? Dig down and it’s just this peace and surety, and that can be found anywhere, anytime. You’re confused about what to do? You’re confused about what you’re supposed to be? Remember, it doesn’t really matter. Just do something. Do anything. Be nobody. The greatest ambition is to have no great ambition. Be what this aggregate is right now. You’re purpose is worry-free. You feed and clothe and house yourself by selling your time to someone else. Time is cheap. Time is impossibly expensive. So be it. What a day this has been. Lift up your head and let go. Sink down into the sunny warmth of the impossible.

Here is what you need to do: go to work. Write some little thing. Take a picture of something. Talk to patrons. Talk to co-workers. Make your lunch. Smoke and think about quitting smoking. Or don’t. Read. Come home. Buy milk and coffee and that third thing that you know you need but can’t remember at the moment. Clean your room. Clean out the fridge. Take out the trash. Watch a documentary. Eat dinner. Go to bed. Get up early and write. Tell yourself a good story. Write down the good story. Find a place to live for the next year. Fix things that need fixing. Don’t fix things that don’t need it. Don’t worry. Live simply. Do not crave fame. Do not crave fortune. Do not crave solitude. Do not crave company. Be what you are in the instant that you find yourself in it. Learn to listen to the silence of God. Walk down the street. Love the things you love. But let them go when they fly away. Sit down. Get up. Hate the things you hate. But let them go when they fly away. Sit down. Get up. Exist peacefully. Forget the things that don’t matter. Remember the things that do. Discover what matters in this moment and forget what does not exist at this moment. Don’t be smart. Don’t be dumb. Be in this moment and let it go when this next moment comes. You will die, but you’re not dead right now. Where are you? You’re right here. The bell will ring, the instants will be done. It will be time to take a picture. Sit down. Get up. Let go.