Which Is a Bad Poem Entitled: “For the Seduction of the Forgetting Girl on Earth-619”
“For the Seduction of the Forgetting Girl on Earth-619”
Come to me my lovely freak of angles, bones and sighs.
My unplanned room awaits your sounding breaths.
This here. This there. Tantamount to compromise.
Like hell I’d have any of that.
Come only as you are stripped free of politics.
We here truck only with the Lord sans choir.
When you enter, leave sound judgment at the door. Wear green.
I’ll tell thin lies to compliment.
Come down the street through rough whetted snow.
Follow the course of the 20 bus, outbound.
We are not prisoners here. It’s just that the letters still hold.
Evidently, I’m self-seduced.
Come take me up, away the night to the damn forgetting place.
The word that sits above the brow is thick with intransigence.
Arrive, dear spider on rooftop winds. Knit a Mobius of palm lines.
I swear to let your mutant power consume me in the morning.
posted by Spike at 7:36 PM
4 Comments:
"knit a mobius of palm lines"...great line...yeah...that's my favorite
Yeah, mine too. And that one was only like, three re-writes. I also like the double meaning in the word "compliment." Hmmm... wasn't there another comment? Ahh, well.
Not bad at all in three re-writes. You picked some excellent multifaceted words here. I love those. Methinks you should not go so long between stints of poetry composition.
Why thank you. I should clarify: that one line about the mobius got three re-writes. The first stanza thingy got like twelve. It could use more. The third stanza thingy could use like seventeen.
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