Mostly About "Lost"

05/09/2008 6:33 AM – 7:01 AM

The sky is light, unclouded save for a few tufts that add dimension to the picture. I feel good. I was obsessed with Lost all night. I fell asleep thinking about it. I woke up thinking about it. This makes me unaccountably happy. Why should this show be the one which lights me up?

Happy people have packed schedules. They fill their time with activities which fully (or nearly fully) engage them. Their off-work time is filled with work. This astounds me. But then I can see that I actually rarely vegged out unless it was both an opportunity to escape and a way of raising my finger to authority. When there is no authority telling me that I must not watch TV, I rarely watch TV. Except for Lost. And a handful of other "myth" shows that aren’t currently on (X-Files, Twin Peaks, Northern Exposure, etc). Odd thing about video games, I realized that they aren’t passive leisure pursuits. They actually do engage you in flow. The only thing is, when I finish playing, I don’t feel as if I’ve accomplished anything. Well, if I play them alone. Well, the majority of the time that I play them alone. Every once in a great while, playing video games alone is exactly what I wanted.

That dude that just rode by on his bike was leaning back against the sissy bar. Can you do that? What else is it that I can do to fill my time with meaning? How do you really live in living? I know that I should sleep more. Be asleep by 9 so I can wake up by 5. But I get distracted. And Lost is on till 11 now. Stupid competition. But I like CSI and Supernatural and the NBC comedies too. Not to the extent that I like Lost, but there you are. How is it that Lost ceases to be apathetic entertainment for me? 4 years of dedicated watching play into it, no doubt. Is it the whole “existence is a mystery” aspect? Just the damn good mystery aspect? The socializing “water-cooler/fan-blog” aspect? Maybe it’s as simple as being a few years dedicated to a well done thing. Ha. Like being married. Maybe that’s what marriage is about – the strange intrigue of being dedicated to a good thing for a long time. But it’s full time, not just one hour a week. But it’s got boobs. But it gets stupidly cranky. But it hugs. But it makes you do chores that don’t really need doing. But it smiles with its eyes. But it talks to you when talking doesn’t do any good. But it talks to you. Existence is weird.