In Which It Is Noted That There Is A Window Out the Window

06/29/2006 6:07 AM – 6:30 AM

Remember again that existence exists without your permission, that writing is just throwing the words down on paper as they are told to you, that editing is something different from writing and is done at a different time. Where is it that you want to be? Want to be where you are and the desire is accomplished, you are content. The carnivore makes a better shepherd than the herbivore because it has more at stake. Better not to have a shepherd and run unencumbered. The past is immutable, the future is unknowable, and the present is already gone. Seeing what is here is better than desiring what isn’t.

I was seventeen once. I was six. I was twelve. Just yesterday, I was thirty. Doesn’t matter. There’s a window out my window. There’s wind in the trees. There’s clouds and sunlight. This is enough. Doesn’t feel like it? All that it is is feel. Is or is not. Can you make it be? Is it worth the effort? What in the future has strong enough feel to out-weigh the pull of this instant? Save your money. Perhaps if I remind you enough, you will. Let go of the foolish nows and remember the necessary weight of the future betters.

But then they say there are no betters. Bah. Only in the present. You have to make assumptions. You have to buy into the system for a time in order to buy out of it. That the system is flawed does not change the fact that is rides most everything. You want to get out of the system? Then don’t buy that slice of pizza. Keep your money. That is the thing. Remember in the instant that in the instant, all things are equal and choose the hope over the shiny trinket. Get rid of your shiny trinkets and hold on to the intangible hope. Of course this contradicts, most true things do. Swallow the contradiction and hold it until it dissolves and becomes self-evident. Get up in the morning, go to work. Have as few obligations as you possibly can. Save your money. Don’t eat the pizza. Eat the sandwich you made at home. Exercise. Sleep at night. Go. Eat your bread with joy and drink your wine with a merry heart. Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all you might. God has already accepted your works. You will find nothing better in all of the strange days of your strange life.