On Eligibility

11/28/2006 8:21 AM – 8:43 AM

To be good. To be acceptable. To be perfect. What is the true height of a man? When will one know that it is enough? Oh Lord won’t ya buy me a pink Cadillac. I’d settle for something verifiable. I’d settle for something like true, justified belief.

Ah but that is an old song, these are old blues, and these are not my words. But they’re mine to use. Citation needed and the no-answer is enough. Forgetting the day, the words, the weakness, being in the here, seeing what is, asking no questions but the ones you can make up the answers to. 1. Get up early; 2. Sit; 3. Write; 4. Walk to work. How hard can it be? Ten-thousand, ten-thousands and some change. But you get up and you do and that will have to be enough. To be honest. To work hard. To enjoy your existence. These will have to be enough. And these are just old words. But they’re mine to use.

Stop, start again. Something for today. Something for tomorrow. Something for yesterday. Forgetting what was. Forgetting what will be. Doing what is here. What is better? What is worse? What is enough? No-answer. So find yourself here, doing here things. Exist and let it go. Tell stories in the morning light. Fall asleep to the quiet of the single bed. Work and work hard while the day is on and the other man’s watch pays you to get out of bed. Tomorrow and something. Today and something. No-sense and nonsense. Forgetting what you’ve failed again. Doing what is. The impossibility of correct makes it fall away. Sometimes. Enough to be here doing doable things. Enough to live in the thick of a small existence. Enough to forget. Enough to remember. Being here in the time of plenty, when the field mice grow fat and no one begrudges them their life. Out among the better moors, when good is at hand and good waits for your return. The general enfolds the specific and we fall away with enough. Get up then. Get up and steal your joy from the multitude of indifferent voices. Be good. Be acceptable. Be perfect. Ha and a long way to the bank. Close your eyes and see enough. It’ll get you through to the next.